Don’t teach them they can have anybody they want. Teach them, instead, they shouldn’t want anybody they can have.
I hear people building up their kid’s egos as though they are the only attractive person alive.
I love my kids too, don’t get me wrong. I want them to know they are important. Teaching your kids that they shouldn’t settle is a good thing, but not when it blows their head up with an ego so large it can fill the room with hot air.
If your parents have given you this type of ego, let me tell you something your parents may not have- you are not indispensable. As easy as the world is now, a guy or girl can replace you with another attractive person in a matter of hours.
Your attractiveness isn’t where your value comes from.
Being dumped can leave you feeling worthless, depressed, and maybe even feeling like you have no hope. Don’t place your value in your relationships, they can let you down. Also, your relationships and attractiveness can change over time.
I recently read an article about an attractive female who was caught in a car fire. Her attractiveness was changed in a matter of moments, and so was her entire world.
Her husband still loved her regardless of her fleeting beauty. He said he stayed with her because he didn’t marry her for her looks. He saw beyond the face and into the heart.
A person’s value comes from a good heart.
I buy and sell antiques as a side job. I occasionally find something that is so valuable, I can’t let it get away. I do what it takes to take possession of that property because I see it as a treasure.
Sometimes the value is monetary. Sometimes it is sentimental. Sometimes it is because the piece is just so beautiful, I don’t want to pass it up.
However, the beauty doesn’t always prompt me to keep it. Most of the time I sell beautiful antiques.
It is usually the value behind the beauty, that makes me want to keep it as my own.
For example, I had an 1880’s ebony upright grand piano that I kept for about 9 years. Despite being difficult to move, I moved that piano to three different investment houses we lived in because I didn’t want to part with it.
Most movers wouldn’t take the job because we had stairs, or they were too expensive. We had to get friends to help us move it each time. Even so, I was determined to keep it and restore it one day.
I treasured it. It was one of the only treasures I’ve ever fought to keep because I knew how grand it would be if I restored it.
I rarely hold onto things for a long period of time because selling things is what I do. However, this piano was special to me. I always wanted to play the piano when I was a child. It was a dream. I bought this piano with the intention of restoring it and learning to play. It was exactly the kind of piano I had wanted for many years.
I cherished it much more than most of my other possessions. It had years of aging and character marks on it. The keys were ivory. The cabinet had intricate details. It was just beautiful.
It wasn’t until moving it became a burden that I decided to let it go. I finally parted with it because it was more trouble than it was worth to keep it.
There isn’t a thing in my house I wouldn’t have parted with if need be, except for that piano. But eventually, I had to let it go since we live in the houses we flip.
Do you catch my drift?
Things we find valuable, we fight to keep them. We protect them. We cherish them. Things, even beautiful things, are easier to let go of if they’re a burden.
If you give something away for free, chances are the value will not be realized. Be what another person sees as irreplaceable.
I’ve had so many beautiful antiques throughout the years, I wouldn’t be able to name them all. I can recall about $40,000-$50,000 worth recently, that I sold and parted with in order to have the money to remodel my house, put new wheels on my husband’s truck, and pay off some of our debts.
Many times, I sold them below value in order to replace them with the money that I needed for other things. I didn’t think twice about replacing beautiful things with money.
They were all beautiful antiques, all worthy of my time, all of which I SOLD. I’ve rarely had something so beautiful that I kept it permanently.
A good heart is like a fine antique. It is rare. It is valued. It is something that other people try to latch onto because it is so hard to find.
Attractiveness can only get a person’s attention. A good heart can keep that attention. Beauty fades with health issues, age, or things out of our control. A good heart will last until a person’s dying day.
Beauty is vain. It is something that doesn’t last forever. If something beautiful becomes a burden, it is easy to let go of. Beauty has no real value. A good heart, on the other hand, is something that people will notice beyond an introduction.
I once knew a pretty girl who had a bitter, angry, and easily offended heart. She just couldn’t get past what she needed and wanted out of life. She expected other people to go out of their way to please her. She was even demanding. This was such a turn off it was hard for her to keep a man in her life for any length of time.
Being able to stay in a relationship doesn’t prove you have a good heart, but a heart that is not so good is easily replaced.
A lack of self-respect will cause you to get used and left behind.
Beauty doesn’t keep anyone’s attention, nor does it earn anyone’s respect.
A kind heart is something a person will take notice of permanently. Compassion and love for others will cause you to shine above all others. Forgiveness will make you stand out where others don’t. A funny or friendly personality is gold in today’s world.
Be the kind of person you would want to hold onto. Be the kind of person that realizes where your value is. Don’t place your value in vain things.
Above all, protect your most valuable asset by settling for no less than respect. Don’t ignore your attractiveness but don’t let it become your main focus. Don’t try to get attention only with your looks.
Last but not least, don’t think of yourself as indispensable. If you do, you may be the first thing a person disposes of.